Two of the pastors who attended my pastors retreat in Eldoret, kenya |
I am praying to love as God loves. I would not be praying like this if I already loved as God loves.
I am familiar with the Scriptures. I read the many stories of the love of God. I may be a fool, but at least I can see the great abyss between whatever love I have and the love of God.
God's love is not like ours.
This is, from one perspective, good. If God's love was like ours, then God would be reduced to the lowest common denomination of love. God's love would be a single penny. God's love would have little to give.
If God's love was like ours, then God would be escorted off the throne where he reigns over the cosmos, and take a seat in the recliner, ruling over the remote control.
It is good that God's love is not like ours. It is not good that our love is not like God's.
God's love is unpossessive. God's love is pure because it needs nothing. (See Thomas Merton, A Book of Hours, 118)
You can only love when you do not need. Because need grasps, so that it may possess. Love holds things and people lightly, and holds onto God tightly.
True love holds, without owning. God's love does not control or demand our reciprocity. God's love waits. Only the unpossessive can wait. Only those who wait are free to love. True love waits for a response.
I am praying for a love like this to find its home in my heart.